Complacent Rulings, Lasting Damage
“Remember that most people will pretend to operate in your interest while operating in their own.” —Ray Dalio Dalio wasn’t talking about family courts when he wrote this, but he…
The Myth of Utah’s “Standard Parent-Time”
Utah law does not impose a mandatory “standard parent-time” schedule. The schedules in Utah Code § 81-9-302 are only possible options for courts to consider. In practice, however, judges often adopt them with little…
How Social Media and Digital Communication Have Changed Divorce Evidence
The explosion of text messages, emails, and social media has had a significant impact on divorce litigation. The Shift: From He Said/She Said to Digital Receipts Not long ago, custody…
What Impact Are Current Economic Conditions Having on Alimony and Property Division Outcomes in Divorce Cases?
If you’re divorcing now, the economy matters more than you may think. Economic forces shape divorce outcomes in Utah. Current economic conditions are having a very real, measurable effect on…
Divorce Without the Drama: 12 Practical Preparation Steps Anyone Can Take Now
Divorce is a legal process, yes, but it’s also financial, practical, and personal. The smartest moves you can make in divorce are those you make before you file that petition…
The Most Common Non-Legal Mistakes Divorce Clients Make That Complicate Their Cases
One’s divorce case rarely falls apart just because it is legally or factually weak. More often, it’s the divorcing parties themselves who complicate their cases through avoidable mistakes. Courts in…
My Divorcing Spouse and I Are Drowning in Debt. How Do We Apportion Responsibility for It All in the Divorce Case?
In Utah divorce, debt is divided equitably, not equally. Mortgages, credit cards, student loans, and medical bills are treated differently, and creditors can still pursue you even if your ex…
Why Custody Evaluations in Utah Should Be Recorded and Transparent
In Utah today, custody evaluations are often conducted behind closed doors. The evaluator interviews the parents, the children, and collateral witnesses (neighbors, teachers, extended family, therapists, coaches, pastors, etc.), but…
Beyond Specific Legal Arguments, What Is One Significant Way the Court System Could Better Ensure Fairness for All Parents in Child Custody Disputes?
I apologize in advance; I cannot limit myself to just one answer, but I will start off with the “top” idea and then share others. Courts could make custody disputes…
What Advice Would You Give to Someone Who Is Contemplating Divorce?
Divorce is almost always harder, slower, more expensive, and more damaging—financially and emotionally—than people expect. Unless you are married to someone truly abusive or irreparably toxic, the better course is…
Judicial Overreach in Utah Child Custody Order: Return to Restraint
In Utah, as in other states, courts deciding child custody and parent-time disputes are charged with applying the “best interests of the child” standard. That standard is necessary, but it…
Why Are Divorce Cases Often Delayed?
After 28 years of divorce practice (as of the date this post is shared), I've watched countless cases that could have and should resolve in months drag on for a…
Should I Go Through My Child’s Phone or Other Devices During the Divorce?
Why this comes up Divorce makes parents hyper-vigilant. A child’s smartphone can feel like the master key to what’s really happening—messages with the other parent, photos, social media, location history.…
How Well Divorce Mediation Works Depends on How Well You and Your Spouse Work Together
Don’t divorce lawyers make mediation harder and more expensive? I'm a divorce lawyer, and I'll be the first to admit it: sometimes lawyers can do more harm than good in the…
I Love My Stepchildren, How Can I Spend Time with Them After the Divorce?
Love vs. Law In Utah, stepparents have no inherent visitation rights during the pendency of divorce proceedings or after the court issues the divorce decree. Unless you qualify under the…
Sample Objection Language for GAL and Custody Evaluator Overreach in Utah Courts
(For educational purposes only. Consult your attorney before you considering using these in your own case.) GAL Acting Like a Witness Without Being Sworn “Your Honor, I object. The Guardian…
Analyzing the Reasonableness of Flat Fees in a Billable-Hour Profession
For generations, the billable hour has been the dominant billing tool of the legal profession. Consequently, courts, attorneys, and even clients have assessed “reasonableness” of an attorney’s fees against the…
Compelling Reasons for Permitting Litigants and Their Attorneys to Appear Remotely for Court Hearings
Compelling Reasons for Permitting Litigants and Their Attorneys to Appear Remotely for Court Hearings
World War II’s silk shortage forced the military to abandon a comfortable default; nylon parachutes—stronger, cheaper, and mass-producible—started as a substitute and became the superior standard. COVID-19 did the same…
My Spouse is a Criminal, How Can I Avoid His Downfall?
My Spouse is a Criminal, How Can I Avoid His Downfall?
When people discover that his or her husband or wife is committing crimes or has been convicted of crimes, they often panic. One of the first questions we hear in…
Setting a Litigation Budget in Family Law Cases: An Idea Worth Developing
Setting a Litigation Budget in Family Law Cases: An Idea Worth Developing
Divorce lawyers have long grappled with one of the most disheartening realities of our practice: watching a marital estate, built over years, dissolve not into two separate households, but go…
Utah Motion for Temporary Orders: What They Can Cover, and How to File for One
Utah Motions for Temporary Orders: What They Can Cover, and How to File for One
When a Utah divorce case is commenced, life doesn’t stop while the case is pending. Children still need a consistent schedule. The mortgage, utilities, and insurance bills still come due.…
Don’t Let This Happen to You When Drafting a Legal Custody Child Custody Award
If a parent is awarded sole legal custody of a child, does that award not carry with it an implicit obligation to exercise that sole legal custody power in good…
Can You “Buy” a Quicker Divorce Settlement in Utah?
Will offering your spouse more money guarantee a quick Utah divorce settlement? Sometimes. But it often backfires. Here’s how Utah divorce law treats lopsided settlements, when “buying peace” makes sense,…
Alcohol Use Monitoring in Custody and Divorce Cases and Which Monitoring Device and Service to Use: BACtrack vs. Soberlink
When alcohol use (or accusations of it) becomes a custody or parent-time issue, courts want two things: reliable measurements and confidence that the right person took the test. BACtrack and…
In Utah divorce cases, an in-person appraisal is the gold standard for home valuation.
What Is the Home Worth in Your Divorce Case?
(Guest post by Broker and Divorce Real Estate Agent Joe Gordon) While popular and easily accessible, automated valuation models (AVMs)—tools like Zillow’s Zestimate, Redfin Estimate, and other algorithm-based home value…
Why Don’t My Kids Like Me After the Divorce? I’m Not a Bad Person. Not Even Close. I Haven’t Changed. What Could Have Happened?
One of the most painful parts of a divorce can be if children seem to pull away from you. It’s a situation many divorced and separated parents face: after a…
Guardians ad Litem and Custody Evaluators in Utah: Too Often Biased, Flawed, and Beyond Accountability
In Utah custody disputes, Guardians ad Litem (GALs) and custody evaluators can have enormous influence over the outcome, often so much so that it’s far more than the law actually…
Should I Tell My Spouse Before I File for Divorce? Or Will That Put Me at a Disadvantage?
Telling your spouse you are considering divorce before filing can either open the door to a cooperative, low-drama split—or give them time to get the jump on you and hurt…
Should I Forgive My Spouse for Abusing Me and/or Our Children?
Forgiveness is a deeply personal decision, and in the context of abuse it can be a life-altering one. But understand that “forgiving” your spouse for abusing you or your children…
I Can No Longer Afford My Divorce Attorney. What Should I Tell My Attorney? And What Are My Options if I Proceed Without an Attorney in My Divorce Case?
TL;DR: If you can’t afford your Utah divorce attorney anymore, tell him/her immediately. You may be able to arrange a payment plan, switch to limited scope services, or proceed on your…
Arbitration–Mediation in Utah Divorce and Family Law: What It Is and When It Works Best
TL;DR: Arbitration–mediation (arb-med) in Utah divorce and family law starts with arbitration, then gives the parties a final chance to settle in mediation before the arbitrator’s decision becomes binding. It saves…
What Potential Issues and Problems Should I Anticipate and Take Action On Now as a Divorced Parent Whose Minor Children Will Be Going Back to School or Starting at a New School This Fall?
Don’t wait until the first day of school to address custody schedules, school choice, communication with the school, extracurricular costs, or special needs. Review your decree, coordinate with your ex…
I Want to Propose a Settlement in My Divorce Case. How Do I Know What to Offer?
Are you thinking about offering a settlement in your Utah divorce or child custody case? Here is what you should consider before you make the first move — including how…
My Lawyer Says That the Things I Think Are Important to My Divorce and Child Custody Case Are not Important (or Not Nearly as Important as I Believe Them to Be). Is My Lawyer Right? How Can I Know? What Do I Do?
Do you wonder whether your divorce lawyer is ignoring what really matters in your divorce or custody case? With this post you will learn why your concerns may be legally…
My Spouse is Disparaging Me Publicly and/or to Our Children—What Can I Do? What Should I Do?
Divorce or custody litigation often brings out the worst in people. Some spouses can't resist the urge to play the victim or the hero in every story they tell, especially…
Can I Stop My Spouse from Bad Mouthing Me During Our Divorce? By Braxton Mounteer, Legal Assistant
It’s not uncommon during a divorce for one spouse to claim that the other is disparaging them—online, in conversations with mutual friends, or even in front of their children. We…
Should You Have Your Spouse or Co-Parent Subject to a Psychological Evaluation in Your Divorce and Child Custody Dispute?
I. Introduction A psychological evaluation in a custody or divorce case sounds powerful. You may believe (or even know) your spouse to be manipulative, unstable, or even dangerous. So why…
A Presumption of Equal Physical and Legal Child Custody Should Be the Norm
Most parents in Utah assume that when they separate or divorce, the court will start from a position of splitting custody evenly. That’s a reasonable assumption—shared parenting has become the…
Reforming Child Custody in Utah Divorce: A Parental Fitness Approach
In Utah, divorce-related child custody disputes often escalate over parenting flaws that wouldn’t justify state intervention outside divorce. This approach is flawed because it creates a double standard that unfairly…
Your Spouse May Not Be a Narcissist; He or She May Just Not Get Along with You
By Braxton Mounteer, Legal Assistant One of the most common accusations we hear in divorce cases today is: “My spouse is a narcissist.” It's become the go-to label for bad behavior,…
Family Lawyers: Why Aren’t More of You Moving the Court to Interview Children Instead of Automatically Requesting PGALs or Custody Evaluators?
Most cases don't need a PGAL or evaluator appointment. Why are court interviews often the better choice?: Quality of evidence: Direct court interviews create objective, recorded testimony rather than subjective, unverifiable,…
The Overrated Book, The Understated Truth: Atomic Habits and the Indispensable Role of Quantity in “Quality” Parent-time
People rave about Atomic Habits by James Clear. I do not. It’s not a bad book, but not life-changing, at least not for me. Maybe it didn’t move me much…
Protecting Parental Rights: Why Sole Custody Shouldn’t Be the Default Response
A single mistake shouldn't cost a parent his or her relationship with his/her child. Yet too often, family courts award sole custody based on isolated incidents or "aberrant behavior" that…
Ream v. Ream – 2025 UT App 105 – What Does and Does Not Constitute Civil Stalking Injunction Violation
2025 UT App 105 THE UTAH COURT OF APPEALS DEBRA JEAN REAM, Appellant, v. JACOB M. REAM, Appellee. Opinion No. 20230799-CA Filed July 10, 2025 Fourth District Court, Provo Department…
Can My Ex Legally Let a Sex Offender Be Around My Kids in Utah?
TL;DR: No, not without strict limits. In Utah, no parent may not allow a registered sex offender to be around your children—even in that parent’s own home—without the other parent’s…
I Don’t Think I Can Continue With My Divorce Case. What Should I Do? By Braxton Mounteer, Legal Assistant
If you’re feeling like you can’t go on with your divorce case, know that you’re not alone in feeling that way. And you’re not weak for feeling overwhelmed. Take a…
I Can’t Believe I’m Giving This Advice, but I Am: Why Every Divorced Parent Should Consider Background Checks on New Partners Who Are or Who Will Be Around Their Kids
If you're divorced and you are, or your ex is, introducing a new boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse into your minor children’s lives, you should seriously consider running a background check…
Is Required Divorce Mediation Under the Utah Code a Waste of Time? By Braxton Mounteer, Legal Assistant
If you get divorced in Utah, you may be surprised to learn that you are required—unless you are excused for good cause—to attend at least one session of mediation before…
What Are the Biggest Challenges Men Face During Divorce, and Why Do Some Believe the System Is Unfair to Them?
It is not a matter of beliefs that men are generally (not in every single case, but generally) treated unfairly in divorce. It is a fact. This is why many…
Child Custody and the “Primary Caregiver” Scam
Of the Utah domestic relations commissioners and judges who treat fathers as second-class parents in making temporary and permanent custody and parent-time rulings, they practically gush about the standard for…