I have a debit card in my name. Can my parents take it?
I’m assuming that this question comes from someone who is a minor child (i.e., someone who is under the age of 18 and not a legally recognized adult or legally emancipated). This…
Erring on the side of caution is not merely cowardly, it is evil
Erring on the side of caution is not merely cowardly, not merely corrupt, it is evil. We are to look upon it as more beneficial, that many guilty persons should escape unpunished, than…
Is the divorce rate rising during the COVID-19 pandemic?
I’ve been a divorce attorney for 25 years, and I don’t see any difference in the divorce rate between the pre-and post-COVID-19 eras. That’s not a scientific study, just anecdotal…
Have you, or someone you know, ever had to share joint custody of a pet due to a breakup/divorce? If so, how did that work out? Was the time actually 50/50?
Many married couples are now foregoing having children but still feel a need for caring for something other than themselves individually and for each other, and so they get a…
Parental alienation
I just read the following comment made by a viewer of my UFLTV parental alienation interview with Kelly Peterson. This viewer wrote, “So basically, parental alienation is proved by documenting the instances…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 18
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 18: Financial Declarations and Initial Disclosures By Quinton Lister, legal assistant My minimal exposure to the legal profession as a legal…
How do I get custody back of my child if the custodial parent is not keeping the child safe?
The best way to phrase this question is as follows, “How do I get an order awarding custody of our child to me, if I assert as the basis for…
If two unwed people have a child and split up, is it treated like a divorce?
If two people have a child out of wedlock, and they split up, is it treated like a divorce? I will answer this question for the jurisdiction of Utah. The…
How do I get an attorney to represent me against my abusive ex narc?
How do I get an attorney to represent me in court against my abusive ex narc who is filing for emergency custody of our children? Two things (if the lawyer…
How do courts insist upon custody evaluations being conducted?
With rare exception in Utah (so rare that it might as well be non-existent), the way courts insist upon custody evaluations being conducted consists of: the court imposing one and…
How do you go through a custody battle and the only thing they can use is making up lies, manipulating the children to tell lies?
If you want my answer, skip to paragraph three. 1. First, it may be the case (and it may be that you need to acknowledge) that the problem is not…
The Protective Order Deception
We all know that a protective order provides little to no substantive protection for the purported victim. The joke around the legal profession is that when a bullet, blade, bat, or fist is headed your…
What are the divorce laws in Utah?
I don’t want to appear immodest, but honestly, my book is probably the best source in one volume: https://store.legal.thomsonreuters.com/law-products/Treatises/Utah-Family-Law-2020-2021-ed-Vol-2-Utah-Practice-Series/p/106664782 You can also find the laws governing Utah divorce and family…
If a married couple divorces and neither one wants their child, what happens?
Great question. I have discussed this question with others. Their first reaction to the question is along the lines of “Oh, that’s terrible!,” but then we discuss the fact that…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 14: Preparedness and Honesty
By Quinton Lister, Legal Assistant My new job as a legal assistant to a divorce attorney has opened my eyes to the necessity of preparation. There are emergencies and surprises…
Why isn’t there a child support debit card, so the funds can be tracked and itemized to prevent mismanagement?
In Utah, such a thing can be done, but I have never, in 24 years of practice, seen it ordered or agreed to (I’ve heard rumors that some parents have…
How Courts Can (and often do) Ensure There’s No Proof Joint Equal Custody Can Work
Here is an example of an important gotcha factor to be on guard against, if you are a good father being forced by the legal system to fight for joint…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 13: Thoughts on ADR
By Quinton Lister, Legal Assistant Part of what has drawn me to my current position as a legal assistant to a divorce attorney is that I wanted to learn more…
In Utah is there a minimum age at which minor children can be left at home or allowed to walk to school by themselves?
No. There is no minimum age at which child can be left unsupervised in Utah. Child and Family Services uses the following definition to evaluate each situation: Non-Supervision – The…
What is one thing you wish you would have added in your divorce parenting plan?
Here are some provisions that I have seen divorce litigants who did not include them in their divorce settlement agreements wish were included: a “loser pays” clause for 1) when…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 12: Perfection
By Quinton Lister, Legal Assistant It doesn’t take a lawyer to discover, and it doesn’t take long to realize, that the legal profession is by no means perfect. The legal system…
My ex is a nut job. I was served with court papers for paternity, child support, and custody for unnamed yet to be born child #1 & #2. Problem is I’m not pregnant. What do I do?
Thanks for the laugh. In 25 years of family law practice I’ve never heard of a man seeking custody of children (plural) that do not exist, nor have I ever…
What happens to a child support order if both parents move out of the country?
Unless the child support order provides for a change in the child support obligation or benefit in the event and due to the parents moving out of the country, then…
How can I get an emergency hearing for custody and child support?
I will answer this question based upon the law of the jurisdiction where I practice family law (Utah). So the question is: How can I get an emergency hearing for…
What is the success rate of having a court-appointed legal aid?
I don’t know, and I doubt that statistics are kept on such a question. If there are such statistics, I do not know of them. Generally, the reputation appointed counsel…
How do I best grab the attention of an attorney regarding a child custody case that is unusual, difficult, and I need help?
With money. And enough money to prove you can afford to pay the attorney to do the job well. Enough money to make the job worthwhile for the lawyer. That’s…
How do I prepare for family court mediation?
How do I prepare for family court mediation? There appears to be a lot of confusion and fear surrounding the divorce mediation settlement conference. There shouldn’t be. The two main…
Are mothers being treated “worse” by the legal system these days, with more and more states leaning toward awarding joint custody to fathers more and more?
No, mothers are not being treated "worse" by the legal system these days, with more and more states leaning toward awarding joint custody to fathers more. Mothers do not have…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 8: Legality vs. Morality
By Quinton Lister, Legal Assistant Since I have started working as a legal assistant, I have come to realize more the nuances of legality vs. morality. For the purposes of…
Can you seek a temporary custody award if you have an apartment but you’re not on the lease, but your fiancé is on the lease and also the child does have their own room?
I get this question frequently. The answer: Sure, you can ask (you can always merely ask) the court to award you temporary custody of the child(ren) under such circumstances, but…
What are the laws for joint custody?
For the jurisdiction where I practice divorce and family law (Utah), the laws the court must consider are found in Utah Code § 30-3-10, 30-3-10.2, and, if the question of…
Why do I pay the child support knowing my kids are living in other countries?
Child support is for the financial support of your children, not a fee (or “ransom”) you pay to keep the children near you. Regardless of where your children live, they…
How do I expose a narcissist in family court?
Pretty much impossible. Why? Two big reasons, generally: Narcissists are masters of deception. Being a narcissist generally not terribly relevant, if relevant at all, to most issues in a divorce…
Can someone go to court to prevent their un-vaccinated ex from taking the kids, even though they share 50-50 custody?
Can he/she go to court? Yes. You can go to court for anything, no matter how serious or how silly your “cause” may be. Whether the court will take your…
In what ways do pro-bono cases help attorneys and law firms?
There are some great answers in this thread already. I hope that adding my two cents’ worth is informative too. I am a divorce and family lawyer. With rare exception…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 4: Trial by fire
By Quinton Lister, Legal Assistant I attended my first trial this past week. I did not question any witnesses or argue the case at the trial or anything like that because I am not a lawyer…
Considering the high cost of child support, does anyone believe that the non-custodial parent is obligated to pay too much for the child’s care? When in a lot of cases where there is split time, one parent is still custodial.
Child support in the jurisdiction where I practice divorce and family law (Utah) is, in my experience and estimation, not too high or too low. I’ll explain (in basic terms)…
Law from a Legal Assistant’s Point of View, Week 1: It’s all new to me
My favorite part of being new at something is that feeling of every aspect being unique and energizing. I am experiencing that feeling now in my new job as a…
Child refuses to leave noncustodial parent’s house. What happens now?
I am the noncustodial parent. Our child came to my house for parent-time and now refuses to leave because he wants to live with me. What happens now? I will…
When do trial lawyers most feel like “they are reading tea leaves”?
In my personal experience, most of the time, with most judges. I’m a divorce and family lawyer in Utah, and family law gives judges such broad discretion that even those…
Recent thoughts about family law
Recent thoughts about family law I’ve been prompted recently to express my thoughts and opinions about the judiciary generally in the family law context. Here are a few thoughts I…
What are common Latin legal terms used in divorce and family law?
What are common Latin legal terms used in divorce and family law? While the use of Latin terms and phrases in the family law is decreasing, there are still many…
Would you consider the family law system a current political issue?
Would you consider the family law system a current political issue or problem? Yes, in fact the institutional defects and injustices in family law and the family law courts throughout…
Should people be allowed to file “alienation of affections” law suits?
Allowed to? Yes. I believe that if one can prove that an otherwise happy marriage was destroyed by a homewrecker, one should have a legal cause of action for alienation…
Why doesn’t family law immediately use collaborative law practices to reach decisions?
Because 1) paradoxically, those for whom the true collaborative law process would work best are those who really don’t need collaborative law; and 2) “collaborative law” as it is practiced (as opposed to how…
