How do courts insist upon custody evaluations being conducted?
With rare exception in Utah (so rare that it might as well be non-existent), the way courts insist upon custody evaluations being conducted consists of: the court imposing one and…
How do you go through a custody battle and the only thing they can use is making up lies, manipulating the children to tell lies?
If you want my answer, skip to paragraph three. 1. First, it may be the case (and it may be that you need to acknowledge) that the problem is not…
How Courts Can (and often do) Ensure There’s No Proof Joint Equal Custody Can Work
Here is an example of an important gotcha factor to be on guard against, if you are a good father being forced by the legal system to fight for joint…
I’m a child whose parents are divorcing and fighting over custody. What can I do?
I’m 15, about to be 16, and my parents are getting a divorce. My father has full custody, but he doesn't want to take me to court to present my…
If the father got the child custody, will the mom pay for child support?
In Utah, the answer is: it’s likely that Mom will pay child support to Dad. Generally, unless the primary joint custodial parents makes orders of magnitude more than the other…
Are mothers being treated “worse” by the legal system these days, with more and more states leaning toward awarding joint custody to fathers more and more?
No, mothers are not being treated "worse" by the legal system these days, with more and more states leaning toward awarding joint custody to fathers more. Mothers do not have…
Why is child support still garnishing my friend’s wages and her children are back in her custody?
There could be at least two possible reasons. 1. Even though the child is living with you, if the court and/or the child support collection agency has not been made…
How do you stay strong while being alienated from your child?
Any way that works for you (without running afoul of God or the law of the land, of course). Parental alienation is one of the most gut-wrenching miseries one can…
Can you seek a temporary custody award if you have an apartment but you’re not on the lease, but your fiancé is on the lease and also the child does have their own room?
I get this question frequently. The answer: Sure, you can ask (you can always merely ask) the court to award you temporary custody of the child(ren) under such circumstances, but…
Why do I pay the child support knowing my kids are living in other countries?
Child support is for the financial support of your children, not a fee (or “ransom”) you pay to keep the children near you. Regardless of where your children live, they…
Should a father who has shared custody see the child son when there is a hospital emergency?
Should a father who has shared custody rights of his child still see the child son when there is a hospital emergency? If your child is in the hospital during…
2021 UT 36 – In re E.R.
2021 UT 36 – In re E.R. IN THE SUPREME COURT OF THE STATE OF UTAH State of Utah, in the interest of E.R., a person under eighteen years of age J.R., Petitioner, STATE OF UTAH, Respondent. …
Considering the high cost of child support, does anyone believe that the non-custodial parent is obligated to pay too much for the child’s care? When in a lot of cases where there is split time, one parent is still custodial.
Child support in the jurisdiction where I practice divorce and family law (Utah) is, in my experience and estimation, not too high or too low. I’ll explain (in basic terms)…
MacFarland v. MacFarland – 2021 UT App 58
021 UT App 58 THE UTAH COURT OF APPEALS BRUCE RAY MCFARLAND, Appellant and Cross-appellee, v. NICOLE S. MCFARLAND, Appellee and Cross-appellant. Opinion No. 20190541-CA Filed June 4, 2021 Second…
If my child’s father puts in writing he would never ask for custody of our daughter, would that weight in if later he changed his mind for court?
Would it have any weight? Yes. Would it, on its own, have weight sufficient to bar him from seeking sole or joint custody of the child in the future? No.…
Do courts make awards in divorce to “punish” adultery?
Do courts make awards in divorce to “punish” adultery? Great question. Adultery is considered a fault-based ground for divorce and a factor that can be considered when the trial court…
When flawed thinking is tragic thinking (thank goodness)
I frequently encounter comments made in child custody disputes to the effect that “courts favor the nurturing and detailed attentiveness of mothers over fathers.” I am as grateful for such comments as I am disheartened by them. Grateful…
Do you agree with Brad Pitt winning joint custody of his children with Angelina Jolie?
I normally don’t comment on popular culture matters dealing with divorce, but for this question I will make an exception. I have no idea what kind of parents Angelina Jolie…
How hard did you have to fight to get custody of your child after divorce as a father? What was the biggest problem you faced?
Allow me to start this answer by clearing the air a bit: First, there are many fathers who are clearly unfit fathers but who nonetheless believe the only or the…
What exactly does the term “will make best efforts” mean in a child custody case?
Great question. Here's a good summary taken from the world of contract law (frankly, the definition of the term “best efforts” likely applies equally well when the term is utilized…
After a divorce, should my kids be with me or with the mom?
First, you need to understand that you’re asking the wrong question. Child custody is not a zero-sum game; otherwise stated, when parents divorce, or when unmarried parents separate, where you…
Why is it OK for a parent to be given custody without their kids’ consent?
Why is it okay for a parent to be given custody without their kids consent or at least their input? This is a great question. I can’t speak for all…
Does a spouse have the right to see a DUI report?
First, if you are referring to a police report of a DUI citation and/or arrest, in most jurisdictions such records are public record, and thus available not only to your…
I have custody of my child. He’s refusing to come home. What now?
I have custody of my child. He left to go to his mom's last Friday for the weekend. He is refusing to come home because he wants to live there.…
“Best interest of the child” and a “material and substantial change of circumstances”
Doyle v. Doyle, 258 P.3d 553 (Utah Ct.App. 2011) 2011 UT 42m ¶ 38, “Even an overwhelming case for the best interest of the child could not compensate for a…
Child refuses to leave noncustodial parent’s house. What happens now?
I am the noncustodial parent. Our child came to my house for parent-time and now refuses to leave because he wants to live with me. What happens now? I will…
Does a spouse have the right to see a DUI report?
Does a spouse have the right to see a DUI report? First, if you are referring to a police report of a DUI citation and/or arrest, in most jurisdictions such…
Judge says stay away from my paramour. Can judge do that?
Judge says stay away from my paramour. Can judge do that? I became pregnant by my paramour after my husband and I separated. The court order states we are not…
Allen v. Allen – 2021 UT App 20 – custody, alimony, child support
Allen v. Allen - 2021 UT App 20 http://www.utcourts.gov/opinions/view.html?court=appopin&opinion=Allen v. Allen20210225_20190369_20.pdf 2021 UT App 20 THE UTAH COURT OF APPEALS REBECCA ELLEN ALLEN, Appellee, v. KENT DARIUS ALLEN,Appellant. Opinion No.…
What are suggestions for modifying child custody for an alternating weekend schedule if Monday drop-offs are removed and weekdays are not an option?
What are suggestions for modifying child custody for an alternating weekend schedule if Monday drop-offs are removed and weekdays are not an option? Is this a trick question? Correct me…
Why is it difficult for a father to get child custody?
Why is it difficult for a father to get child custody? Because there is a pernicious and false belief in far too many of the courts (not, notably, in society…
If a parent disappears for five years, what are his/her chances of winning child custody?
If a parent disappears for five years, what are his/her chances of winning child custody? As long as 1) Dad’s story/situation isn’t worse than Mom’s, and 2) Dad’s not responsible…
My ex allows our children to watch TikTok. Is this grounds for seeking full custody?
My ex allows our children to watch TikTok. Is this grounds for seeking full custody? I forbade my child from watching TikTok because I worry it lowers IQ. However, my…
What happens after an affair when you have kids?
What happens after an affair when you have kids? I will answer as if this question were asked in the belief that the affair will have a profound effect upon…
Can an unmarried parent legally keep the other parent from the children without having gone to court?
Can an unmarried parent legally keep the other parent from the children without having gone to court? Yes. In the absence of a court order to the contrary, it is…
What happens after an affair when you have kids?
What happens after an affair when you have kids? I’ll answer as if this question were asked in the belief that the affair will have a profound effect upon child…
Will my medical marijuana prescription adversely affect my child custody case?
If I have a prescription for marijuana, will this affect my custody case? I do not smoke in front of my child or have it around my child. Probably not,…
How can I choose which of my parents gets custody of me?
How can I choose which of my parents gets custody of me? In Utah, a child can’t choose. At least not anymore. Under current Utah law, children do not get…
Unique challenges for men and women face in divorce and child custody
The unique challenges men and women face in divorce and child custody cases What follows is my opinion, but my honest and sincere opinion born of experience over the past…
What does it take to get the court to award custody to the father?
What does it take to get the court to award custody to the father? Either: A) a miracle or B) the mother has to be so clearly an unfit parent…
Can I refuse visitation when a non-custodial parent refuses to take a child to school?
Can I refuse visitation when a non-custodial parent refuses to take a child to school? In the jurisdiction where I practice divorce and family law (Utah), the answer is: Unless…
Does refusal to return a child after the weekend automatically give me custody?
Does refusal to return a child after the weekend automatically give me custody? My daughter's dad took her for the weekend and never brought her home it's been almost a…
Can a mother keeping the children from the father work against in custody litigation?
Can a mother not allowing the father to see his child without reason work against her in litigation for joint custody? Would the father having children from another relationship living…
If you haven’t seen “Erasing Family” and you’re going through a child custody dispute
If you haven’t seen "Erasing Family" and you’re going through a child custody dispute, you should. You really should. Because you really don't have any idea what you're in for.…
Do I have a chance in divorce court without a lawyer? Do I really need one?
A chance? Sure. You have a chance. And you have a chance of winning the lottery, just not a very good chance of it. You may not want to read…
Why does it seem like courts are against fathers when it comes to custody?
Why does it seem like courts are against fathers when it comes to custody? Because while the courts are becoming less and less biased against fathers as time goes by,…
What does a judge ask a child in a custody case?
In Utah (where I practice divorce and child custody law) the answer is: it’s almost impossible to say. Why? For reasons that I assert I can demonstrate are not highly…
Is it advantageous to lie and sling mud at the other parent to win custody?
Today's question is: Is it advantageous for the father to file with the court a 2 page document of fabricated lies about mother in a child custody battle as part…
Can my ex use the panic over COVID-19 to withhold the kids from me?
“Can my ex use the panic over Coronavirus/COVID-19 to withhold the kids from me?” “Will I still be free to pick my son up at the end of the week…
Do the family courts in the U.S. tend to favor the mother over the father?
Do the family courts in the U.S. tend to favor the mother over the father? Generally, yes. The courts are slowly, but noticeably, becoming less biased in favor of mothers…