What advice would you give to someone whose divorce is going to court?
What advice would you give to someone who has just become one of the parties in a divorce proceeding? #1. Know this: divorce law and the divorce process are almost…
How do you win a case against your ex for false accusations?
If you find an attorney who knows a sure-fire, fail-safe way to defend an ex-spouse or an ex-boyfriend/ex-girlfriend against “false accusations,” that attorney is likely a multimillionaire because possessing such…
How can I help my step-child get away from an abusive mother?
How can I help my 12-year-old step-daughter get away from an emotionally abusive mother? Tell the child’s father (your husband) about the trouble and have him handle it. It’s not…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 33
By Quinton Lister, legal assistant One part of my job as a legal assistant that I have yet spoken of has been my day-to-day interaction with potential clients. When you…
What is the best DIY book about divorce in the U.S.?
There isn’t one. There can’t be. I’ll explain why and what you can and should do if you want to go the DIY divorce by the book route. The main…
Should I use free family law resources?
Merely use them? I don’t see the harm in being familiar with them. Reading, watching, listening. Learning. That’s a good thing. A very good thing. Being dependent upon only free resources? No. That’s…
Why do spurned spouses refuse to participate in certain parts of divorce?
Why do spurned spouses often refuse to participate in certain aspects of their own divorce proceedings despite the headache it creates for all parties involved? Spurned spouses sometimes refuse to…
Family Law Legislation 2022 – Part 1
Family Law Legislation 2022 - Part 1 This blog post reviews four bills among new proposed legislation during the 2022 session of the Utah State Legislature that deal with divorce…
What is the basis for everything I have to do for my Utah divorce case?
What is the legal basis for all the hoops I have to jump through in my Utah divorce case? This is a great question. It’s a question I often ask…
Do letters vouching for one’s character really matter?
My lawyer asked me to get letters of my character from my friends for family court to introduce as evidence, but do they really matter and is 12 enough? Do…
Does the respondent get a copy of a restraining order?
Yes, the respondent gets one, as long as the respondent can be found so that he/she can be handed, mailed, or electronically provided with a copy. Indeed, if a respondent…
Wadsworth v. Wadsworth – 2022 UT App 5 – marital estate
2022 UT App 5 THE UTAH COURT OF APPEALS CANDI WADSWORTH, Appellant, v. GUY L. WADSWORTH, Appellee. Opinion No. 20190106-CA No. 20200430-CA Filed January 13, 2022 Third District Court, Salt…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 26: Lying
By Quinton Lister, legal assistant Lying is corrosive. Lying does not allow us to be the best version of ourselves. Lying keeps us in denial about the actual state of…
The way UT courts conduct custody evaluations nowadays is indefensible
The way courts in Utah conduct custody evaluations nowadays is indefensible. There is nothing in UCJA rule 4-903 (the rule governing custody evaluations) that requires a custody evaluation to consist of little…
What affects the outcome of court cases more?
What affects the outcome of court cases more, the relative strengths and experience of the opposing lawyers, actual facts, relevant law, or some other factor? I answer this question in…
Should a parent prorate child support to include the child’s 18th birthday?
What would you think of a parent who makes the last child support payment prorated 7 days because the child’s 18th birthday falls on the 7th? I see nothing illegal…
What has a lawyer said that made you question their expertise?
What’s one thing you’ve heard a lawyer say that made you question their expertise? I was in court for a hearing in a divorce action where opposing counsel objected to…
What is it like to battle for custody with a narcissist?
Miserable. Narcissists know how to game the system, to exploit its weaknesses, to exploit all that is good in human nature and institutions for destructive ends. It’s virtually impossible to prove that a narcissist is engaging in such misconduct because one of the things that makes a narcissist a narcissist, and so maddeningly effective…
Erring on the side of caution is not merely cowardly, it is evil
Erring on the side of caution is not merely cowardly, not merely corrupt, it is evil. We are to look upon it as more beneficial, that many guilty persons should escape unpunished, than…
Is the divorce rate rising during the COVID-19 pandemic?
I’ve been a divorce attorney for 25 years, and I don’t see any difference in the divorce rate between the pre-and post-COVID-19 eras. That’s not a scientific study, just anecdotal…
Have you, or someone you know, ever had to share joint custody of a pet due to a breakup/divorce? If so, how did that work out? Was the time actually 50/50?
Many married couples are now foregoing having children but still feel a need for caring for something other than themselves individually and for each other, and so they get a…
Parental alienation
I just read the following comment made by a viewer of my UFLTV parental alienation interview with Kelly Peterson. This viewer wrote, “So basically, parental alienation is proved by documenting the instances…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 18
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 18: Financial Declarations and Initial Disclosures By Quinton Lister, legal assistant My minimal exposure to the legal profession as a legal…
How do I get custody back of my child if the custodial parent is not keeping the child safe?
The best way to phrase this question is as follows, “How do I get an order awarding custody of our child to me, if I assert as the basis for…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 16: Self-awareness
By Quinton Lister, legal assistant This new experience working in the legal field has been full of unexpected lessons. One is that it really does help to be self-aware. What…
How do I get an attorney to represent me against my abusive ex narc?
How do I get an attorney to represent me in court against my abusive ex narc who is filing for emergency custody of our children? Two things (if the lawyer…
How do courts insist upon custody evaluations being conducted?
With rare exception in Utah (so rare that it might as well be non-existent), the way courts insist upon custody evaluations being conducted consists of: the court imposing one and…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 15: Objections.
By Quinton Lister, legal assistant I think one of the least understood facets of the legal system by lay people (like myself, a new legal assistant) is the concept of…
The Protective Order Deception
We all know that a protective order provides little to no substantive protection for the purported victim. The joke around the legal profession is that when a bullet, blade, bat, or fist is headed your…
What are the divorce laws in Utah?
I don’t want to appear immodest, but honestly, my book is probably the best source in one volume: https://store.legal.thomsonreuters.com/law-products/Treatises/Utah-Family-Law-2020-2021-ed-Vol-2-Utah-Practice-Series/p/106664782 You can also find the laws governing Utah divorce and family…
If a married couple divorces and neither one wants their child, what happens?
Great question. I have discussed this question with others. Their first reaction to the question is along the lines of “Oh, that’s terrible!,” but then we discuss the fact that…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 14: Preparedness and Honesty
By Quinton Lister, Legal Assistant My new job as a legal assistant to a divorce attorney has opened my eyes to the necessity of preparation. There are emergencies and surprises…
Why isn’t there a child support debit card, so the funds can be tracked and itemized to prevent mismanagement?
In Utah, such a thing can be done, but I have never, in 24 years of practice, seen it ordered or agreed to (I’ve heard rumors that some parents have…
How Courts Can (and often do) Ensure There’s No Proof Joint Equal Custody Can Work
Here is an example of an important gotcha factor to be on guard against, if you are a good father being forced by the legal system to fight for joint…
When a restraining order expires, is there some documentation that the respondent can get to prove the expiration?
In Utah, the answer to your question would be: Yes, in the form of the restraining order itself. The restraining order itself states that “[t]he order shall expire by its…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 13: Thoughts on ADR
By Quinton Lister, Legal Assistant Part of what has drawn me to my current position as a legal assistant to a divorce attorney is that I wanted to learn more…
In Utah is there a minimum age at which minor children can be left at home or allowed to walk to school by themselves?
No. There is no minimum age at which child can be left unsupervised in Utah. Child and Family Services uses the following definition to evaluate each situation: Non-Supervision – The…
What is one thing you wish you would have added in your divorce parenting plan?
Here are some provisions that I have seen divorce litigants who did not include them in their divorce settlement agreements wish were included: a “loser pays” clause for 1) when…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 12: Perfection
By Quinton Lister, Legal Assistant It doesn’t take a lawyer to discover, and it doesn’t take long to realize, that the legal profession is by no means perfect. The legal system…
Can a narcissist get custody of a child?
Of course. First, even if one could prove a parent suffers from narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), merely suffering from this condition wouldn’t automatically disqualify a parent from being awarded sole…
My ex is a nut job. I was served with court papers for paternity, child support, and custody for unnamed yet to be born child #1 & #2. Problem is I’m not pregnant. What do I do?
Thanks for the laugh. In 25 years of family law practice I’ve never heard of a man seeking custody of children (plural) that do not exist, nor have I ever…
What happens to a child support order if both parents move out of the country?
Unless the child support order provides for a change in the child support obligation or benefit in the event and due to the parents moving out of the country, then…
What is the success rate of having a court-appointed legal aid?
I don’t know, and I doubt that statistics are kept on such a question. If there are such statistics, I do not know of them. Generally, the reputation appointed counsel…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 10: Divorce
By Quinton Lister, Legal Assistant I think most of the observations I am having as a new legal assistant are not groundbreaking, but my boss and I are learning that…
How do I best grab the attention of an attorney regarding a child custody case that is unusual, difficult, and I need help?
With money. And enough money to prove you can afford to pay the attorney to do the job well. Enough money to make the job worthwhile for the lawyer. That’s…
How do I prepare for family court mediation?
How do I prepare for family court mediation? There appears to be a lot of confusion and fear surrounding the divorce mediation settlement conference. There shouldn’t be. The two main…
What questions do people ask about divorce?
The FIRST questions most frequently asked of me are: “How much can I expect it to cost me in total to get a divorce?” “What is your hourly rate?” “What…
Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 8: Legality vs. Morality
By Quinton Lister, Legal Assistant Since I have started working as a legal assistant, I have come to realize more the nuances of legality vs. morality. For the purposes of…
How do you stay strong while being alienated from your child?
Any way that works for you (without running afoul of God or the law of the land, of course). Parental alienation is one of the most gut-wrenching miseries one can…
Can you seek a temporary custody award if you have an apartment but you’re not on the lease, but your fiancé is on the lease and also the child does have their own room?
I get this question frequently. The answer: Sure, you can ask (you can always merely ask) the court to award you temporary custody of the child(ren) under such circumstances, but…
