Divorce is for most people a very stressful and emotional process. If you are ready to hire a divorce attorney, knowing how to approach working with your attorney can significantly improve your odds of divorcing on fair terms.
In my experience as a legal assistant, I worked with many different kinds of people, both men and women, in many different kinds of marriages. Regardless of whether you are a man or a woman, whether you have minor children or don’t, whether you are rich or poor, old or young, and regardless of any other distinguishing features of yours, there are certain characteristics that are universal for all good clients in family law cases.
Developing these characteristics (if you haven’t already) and acting consistently in conformity with them throughout your case will help you and your lawyer become a well-oiled machine, increasing your chances of success in your case.
Good clients bring a healthy dose of humility to their relationship with their attorney.
You are hiring an attorney for his or her expertise, so it’s crucial to trust your attorney’s judgment—even when your attorney’s advice is hard to bear. To make it easier to trust your attorney, make sure you find a trustworthy attorney. I will confess that there are a lot of attorneys who cannot and should not be trusted, so choose carefully.
Many clients struggle with trusting their attorneys because they have difficulty ceding control to someone else. Others struggle with an attorney whose advice differs from what the client wants (especially when the client is being unrealistic as to what is possible or likely or when the client is focused on revenge against the opposing party).
A good client understands that his/her attorney’s job is to help the client do what can and ought to be done, not simply tell clients what they want to hear. You will likely need to separate your feelings about your case from what the best strategy for your case is. Once you have found an attorney who is a decent person, diligent, knowledgeable, and skilled, then take heart knowing that your attorney has been through cases much like yours many times before; he/she knows how to guide you through it. Have the humility and good sense to follow your attorney’s advice.
Similarly, accept the facts that 1) your case is likely not as strong as you think it is, and 2) just because you want something badly does not mean you deserve it or will get it. Even the best attorney is not a genie who grants wishes. If your attorney is doing everything he or she reasonably can and within the bounds of the law to help you, that’s all you can fairly expect of your attorney.
Good clients are cooperative and responsive.
Your divorce attorney needs your cooperation to represent you effectively. You have information that only you can give your attorney. If you ignore your attorney’s calls and e-mails, fail to answer important questions, or fail to provide important documentation, you’re slowing your case down and exposing it to damage.
Even if you don’t understand (or see the point of) your lawyer’s questions or requests, respond as best you can, as quickly as you can, and ask for clarification as needed or wanted.
Good clients are engaged.
When clients are active in their own cases, they empower their legal team to deliver the best possible representation. Be actively engaged with your cases and the legal professionals helping you, i.e., your lawyer and his/her staff. Take responsibility for ensuring that every detail you need to address is addressed. This not only strengthens your cases but also builds a collegial, trust-based relationship with your lawyer.
Good clients ask insightful questions, share ideas, and provide critical documents promptly. They collaborate with their lawyers effectively, so that strategies can be developed and fine-tuned successfully.
Good clients are honest.
Be honest, transparent, and forthcoming with your attorney. And don’t ask your attorney to be dishonest or to violate the law and/or court rules. He or she who will lie for you will lie to you.
Don’t spin or sugarcoat things, don’t respond with half-truths, and don’t dodge your own attorney’s probing questions. If you believe it’s smart or clever or “justified” to withhold or misrepresent key information that might damage your case, just see what kind of damage being known as a liar and a cheat does to your case.
Your attorney will do a much better job for you when you tell your attorney the whole truth, warts and all.
Good clients meet deadlines that their attorneys (and the court) give them.
Court deadlines are not suggestions, they are not options—missing one can result in monetary sanctions, in having key evidence barred from admission at hearings or trial, even default judgment against you.
Your attorney may ask you to gather documents, fill out forms, answer questions, or give help with responses to discovery and motions. Doing these things on time and accurately makes the process smoother and less stressful for everyone involved. It can literally save you money. It can literally make the difference between prevailing and defeat.
Keep track of deadlines and court dates. Most deadlines are short (or can feel that way). Waiting until the last-minute leads to hasty, sloppy work and creates unnecessary difficulty and stress for both you and your attorney. Meeting deadlines shows the court that you take the case seriously and it helps your attorney build the best possible case for you.
A good client, despite what many lawyers believe, isn’t just someone who pays their legal fees—it’s someone who is humble, cooperative, responsive, and meets deadlines. Be that kind of client and you will maximize your chances of success in your case.
Utah Family Law, LC | divorceutah.com | 801-466-9277
