Child Custody and the “Primary Caregiver” Scam

Of the Utah domestic relations commissioners and judges who treat fathers as second-class parents in making temporary and permanent custody and parent-time rulings, they practically gush about the standard for…

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Do You Live in Salt Lake, Summit, or Tooele County and Are Being Denied Parent-time by a Non-compliant Co-parent?

Well, then, I have good news and bad news. Good news: you can file a motion with the court to seek relief. Bad news: prepare to wait a while before…

Continue ReadingDo You Live in Salt Lake, Summit, or Tooele County and Are Being Denied Parent-time by a Non-compliant Co-parent?

If the Other Parent Is Withholding Parent-Time, Can I Bypass Having to Deal With Him/Her and Pick Up Our Child After School Instead?

If the other parent of your child is withholding court-ordered visitation (often now called “parent-time”) with the child from you, can you solve this problem by circumventing/bypassing having to pick…

Continue ReadingIf the Other Parent Is Withholding Parent-Time, Can I Bypass Having to Deal With Him/Her and Pick Up Our Child After School Instead?

Making the Expedited Parent-time Enforcement Program Truly Expedited

Given that the 3rd District requires mediation under § 81-9-102(a). (Expedited Parent-time Enforcement Program (emphasis on “expedited”), before it will hear motions to enforce and for sanctions (MTEs) that allege court-ordered…

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What Do Children Whose Parents Were Awarded Equal Physical Custody (50/50) of Them Think of Such a Schedule?

Children's perspectives on shared custody arrangements (equal physical custody being one such arrangement) are complex and nuanced, seeing both benefits and challenges to them. Here is what children typically report about…

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Having Experienced 50-50 Custody as a Child to Teen, What Do You Want Parents to Know?

Simply put, normal children of divorced or separated parents want their parents: not to make custody a turf war. Honor your children’s right to a strong loving and trusting, relationship…

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What Can a Father Do If, After the Divorce, the Mother, Who Has Custody of the Child, Turns the Child Against the Father?

What can a father do if, after the divorce, the mother, who has custody of the child, turns the child against the father? What can he do? There are many things he…

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How Can an Unfair Child Custody Arrangement Be Corrected in Utah?

It depends on how you reached this point, and how much time, if any, you have to fix it. If circumstances relevant to the child custody award have materially and…

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What Should I Do if I Feel Like the County Family Court Judge as Well as My Lawyer Have Not Upheld My Legal Rights as a Parent?

This is a good question because the way you have posed the question reflects the problem many people have with the legal system. Your feeling may stem from the court…

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My Dad and I Want Changes to My Child Custody Orders. Dad Says It Will Be Months Before a New Order Can Be Written. Is That Right?

Probably. If your question is, “Does it take a long time to obtain a court order modifying a child custody award?,” the answer is, generally, “Yes.” I can't speak for…

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It Tolls for Thee: The All Too Frequent Tragic Cost and Futility of Family Court

“Quid rides? Mutato nomine et de te fabula narrator. [Why do you laugh ? Change only the name and this story is about you.]” Here’s a deeply disturbing but all…

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In re K.M. – 2025 UT App 17 – parents regaining custody from guardian

In re K.M. - 2025 UT App 17 Oral argument (Utah Court of Appeals archive): https://youtu.be/e8OUzlARvZk THE UTAH COURT OF APPEALS IN THE INTEREST OF K.M., A PERSON UNDER EIGHTEEN…

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Toward Equal Child Custody Awards in Utah: Progress Made and Still to Be Made

Historically, in the state of Utah, and throughout the United States, cultural bias as to which parent is granted primary custody plays a major role in child custody decisions. Originally,…

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The Difference Between Reunification Therapy and Family Systems Therapy By Braxton Mounteer, Legal Assistant

Families often find themselves having to confront their conflict and dysfunction when a divorce is filed. When families face conflict or dysfunction, therapy can (can, not always will, but can)…

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How Do I Know If My Custody Evaluator and Custody Evaluation Are Any Good? By Braxton Mounteer, Legal Assistant

In your divorce case, you, your spouse (or other parent) and your children may be required to undergo a custody evaluation. The custody evaluation is governed by Utah Code of Judicial Administration Rule…

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How Do I Get Full Custody of My Child From a Bad Mother?

Ideally, with overwhelming amounts of compelling, objectively verifiable evidence that 1) the mother is unfit to exercise custody of the child; and 2) you are fit to exercise custody of the child. Why overwhelming…

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Absolute Opposition to Recording Child Interviews in Child Custody Dispute Cases Is Groundless.

[Full disclosure: I make no secret of the fact that I have yet to encounter a custody evaluation conducted in Utah that is not pseudo-scientific, incompletely and incompetently documented, and…

Continue ReadingAbsolute Opposition to Recording Child Interviews in Child Custody Dispute Cases Is Groundless.

How Can Family Courts Claim to Comply With the Equal Protection Clause When Fathers Receive Primary Custody in Less Than 20% of Cases?

Good point, and good question. Although the amount of time fathers are being awarded with their children is increasing in child custody dispute cases (and has been for the past…

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What to Do When Your Ex Is Threatening to Take Me Back to Court to Change Custody or Reduce Parent-Time

I get calls about this frequently from former and from brand new clients: it may have been half a year or more since the child custody case was resolved, either…

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Can a Parent Send a Third Party for Child Pick Up for Parenting Time if It’s Not a Part of a Utah Custody and Parent-Time Court Order?

If there is no court order that addresses and controls the question of who can pick up or drop off the children in connection with custody and parent time exchanges,…

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The Voice of Reason in a Discussion of Domestic Violence and Child Custody

On October 31, 2024, the Utah Court of Appeals issued it opinion in the case of Lerman v. Lerman (2024 UT App 155). It is a decision Utah sorely needed for how to…

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Lerman v. Lerman – 2024 UT App 155 – Child Custody and Domestic Violence

Lerman v. Lerman - 2024 UT App 155 THE UTAH COURT OF APPEALS DEREK LERMAN, Appellee, v. MICHELLE LERMAN, Appellant. Opinion No. 20230913-CA Filed October 31, 2024 Second District Court,…

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What Are Some Tips for Divorced Parents on How to Handle the Holidays While Co-parenting?

Know this first: the best things to do are often easier said than done. That stated, they are not that hard to do, but many are not that appealing to…

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THE BEST PERSON TO “SPEAK FOR A CHILD” IS THE CHILD HIMSELF/HERSELF, NOT A GUARDIAN AD LITEM

“Speak your mind—even if your voice shakes. . . . When you least expect it, someone may actually listen to what you have to say.” — Maggie Kuhn I have…

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Two Reforms (Of Many) That I Suggest Are Likely Not What You Think They Would Be.

In my opinion (as a divorce and family law attorney for the past 27 years), a “less is more” approach is needed at this point. What do I mean? For…

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Parental Estrangement and Parental Alienation and Parental Estrangement Are Not the Same Thing By Braxton Mounteer, Legal Assistant.

During a divorce case, one parent or the other often claims that parental alienation or parental estrangement is occurring. Whether the claim is true does not stop these terms from…

Continue ReadingParental Estrangement and Parental Alienation and Parental Estrangement Are Not the Same Thing By Braxton Mounteer, Legal Assistant.

My Ex and I Have Joint Custody, but He Hasn’t Been Letting Me See My Child for a Couple of Months Now. Will He Lose Custody if I Go Back to Court and Tell Them About This?

I’ll assume that what you mean by “my ex and I have joint custody” is you and your ex share physical custody of your child. I’ll also assume that in…

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How Difficult Would It Be to Get Legal Custody Back After Willingly Giving 100% Legal Custody to My Child’s Mother?

In Utah, if you have not had your parental rights terminated, but instead you simply agreed to your child’s parent having custody of the child (with you having little to no…

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What do I have to do to modify the child custody and/or parent-time award?

“I want more time with my children.” “Our children want to spend more time with me.” “My ex-spouse does not exercise the time he/she was awarded with our children.” What…

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2024 UT App 91 – In re R.D. – Juvenile Court Jurisdiction – Parental Presumption

2024 UT App 91 – In re R.D. THE UTAH COURT OF APPEALS IN THE INTEREST OF R.D. AND Z.J., PERSONS UNDER EIGHTEEN YEARS OF AGE. K.J., Appellant, v. N.J.…

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Do You Lose Parental Rights Automatically When You Get Divorced if You Do Not File for Visitation or Custody?

Make sure you understand the terms you and others may be using in asking and discussing this question. If you are a parent of minor children, and you are involved…

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I Want to Live with My Mom but I Have Shared Custody With My Dad. What Do I Do? Can I at 15?

This question is literally asked on a daily basis. It comes up so often. But that means it’s a burning question. I’ll bet it has been answered literally at least…

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I Live in Indianapolis, Indiana, I Have a Son at 17 Years Old. I Have Visitation Legal Custody. He Has Him Run Away. What Do I Do?

I am not licensed as an attorney in Indiana, but I will give you my personal opinion (it’s not legal advice) as it applies to the law in the jurisdiction…

Continue ReadingI Live in Indianapolis, Indiana, I Have a Son at 17 Years Old. I Have Visitation Legal Custody. He Has Him Run Away. What Do I Do?

What Would I Have Done Differently If I Were In My Parents’ Shoes? By Braxton Mounteer, Legal Assistant

Like many people, I am a child of divorce. While I may not understand every reason why my parents chose to end their marriage (I was too young to understand…

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What Do We Do When Equal (50/50) Physical Custody Is Awarded but One Parent Isn’t Bearing the Responsibilities Equal Custody Requires of That Parent?

Recently a Quora.com reader commented on my answer to this question: Is there a primary parent in joint custody in Utah which is also known as “equal” or “50/50” custody? They…

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What Can I Do if My Ex Doesn’t Let My Daughter Come for My Parenting Time Which Is Summer? Our Divorce Is Not Finalized Yet.

I can give you my personal opinion (not legal advice, but my personal opinion) from my perspective as a lawyer licensed in Utah and who practices divorce and family law…

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What Are the Odds That I Can Get Custody of My Daughter if I Have a Serious Criminal Record?

Without knowing more about your criminal record, I can still safely predict that having almost any kind of chronic or significant criminal record reduces your chances of being awarded custody…

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Why Get it Straight From the Horse’s Mouth When You Can Get a Truncated Version, Second-Hand?

When a custody evaluator and/or private guardian ad litem is/are appointed in a divorce case in which custody and parent-time of the children is disputed, they usually interview the children…

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Why won’t courts test competing custody and parent-time proposals during the pretrial phase of a case?

Do you want to know where the real money is most often made in divorce and family law cases? Child custody and parent-time disputes, hands down. Rarely do the parents…

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Blanket prohibitions on child testimony in custody and parent-time disputes are irrational and irresponsible

Thomas Sowell said (in a discussion of politics and governance), “There are no solutions. There are only tradeoffs, and whatever you do to deal with one of man's flaws it…

Continue ReadingBlanket prohibitions on child testimony in custody and parent-time disputes are irrational and irresponsible

Is There a Primary Parent in Joint Custody in Utah Which Is Also Known as “Equal” or “50/50” Custody?

Utah, like many states, has struggled with the very concept of equal (“50/50”) custody of children for years. While progress has been made (especially in the past few years), we…

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What are the child custody factors that judges consider?

What are the child custody factors that judges consider when determining what's in a child's best interest in custody disputes according to Utah’s family law statutes? The main factors are…

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Lamb v. Lamb, 2024 UT App 16 – divorce, custody, business, home equity

2024 UT App 16 THE UTAH COURT OF APPEALS JOSEPH EARL LAMB, Appellee, v. SONYA ELIZABETH LAMB, Appellant. Opinion No. 20210787-CA Filed February 8, 2024 Third District Court, Salt Lake…

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Is mom deemed to be unfit or unstable if she’s going to school to better her career for a better living for her two year old child while temporarily receiving unemployment benefits. Can mom still be granted joint custody with the other parent?

I am a divorce and family lawyer. I think you’d be hard-pressed to find a court anywhere in this country (USA) that would consider a mother temporarily receiving unemployment benefits…

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House Bill 193 (HB0198 (utah.gov))

Another bill under consideration during the 2024 Utah legislative session is House Bill 193 (HB0198 (utah.gov)). This bill would, if passed into law, 1) make clear that a “totality of…

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House Bill 140 (HB0140 (utah.gov)), “Amendments to Custody and Parent-Time”

Today’s post on proposed family law legislation under consideration during the 2024 Utah legislative session is House Bill 140 (HB0140 (utah.gov)), “Amendments to Custody and Parent-Time”. This bill, according to…

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How do you survive if the narcissist won custody of your kids and you have to accept it?

Hard truths incoming. When dealing with a co-parent who is afflicted with a personality disorder, do these things, and do them all at the same time: 1) Examine your own…

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Family Law Legislation for the 2024 Utah State Legislative Session

Here is a list of the current proposed family law legislation for the 2024 Utah State Legislative session, along with a (very) brief description of the proposed legislation. If you…

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Obstacles Fathers Face in Trying to Get Joint Custody of Their Children

I have been asked by a reader to answer two questions. The first: whether I believe courts generally apply a double standard in the treatment of mothers and fathers when…

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