We’ve all heard some version of this story: the dramatic, knock-down, drag-out divorce. Where every move is a power play and every lawyer is part strategist, part saboteur.
If you’re facing a contentious divorce, and you know (know, not merely suspect) that your spouse (and his or her snake of a lawyer) is going to lie, manipulate, and exploit every opportunity to take unfair advantage, it might be tempting to fight fire with fire. You might think that hiring an attorney who is willing to play just as dirty is the only way to level the playing field.
We disagree.
Dirty tricks might feel vindicating and empowering, but trying to out-cheat a cheater usually leaves you doubly victimized.
A lawyer who is willing to lie for you is just as willing to lie to you. If your lawyer has no issue with lying, deceiving, concealing, and playing fast and loose with law and ethics for your ostensible advantage, why would ever believe or expect your lawyer would not treat you the exact same way?
An attorney who thrives on cheating does is not picky. If your lawyer is eager to dupe the courts and fleece opposing parties for everything they have, don’t assume that your status as a client exempts you from such treatment.
So, what can you do when your spouse (and his/her attorney) is playing dirty?
Don’t sink to their level. Selling out comes at too great a cost.
Don’t go it alone. Search carefully for an attorney whom you and the court can trust.
When your position is just, you can win without cheating. It can be hard. It can harder than necessary if your spouse and his/her lawyer flout the rules. But if you try to outmaneuver a cheat by becoming one yourself, it can (and usually does) backfire on you. Deep down, you know this. Don’t cheat yourself of your innocence and humanity.
Utah Family Law, LC | divorceutah.com | 801-466-9277
