Are you thinking about offering a settlement in your Utah divorce or child custody case? Here is what you should consider before you make the first move — including how to calculate fair terms, evaluate risk, and protect your credibility.
If you are considering settlement in your Utah divorce or custody case, that is commendable. You are at least trying to approach the process in a constructive manner. However, “wanting to settle” and knowing how much or how little to offer in regard to the issues in dispute are two very different matters. Offer too little, and you appear unreasonable and discourage negotiation. Offer too much, and you deny yourself fair and equitable treatment. Reaching the right balance requires understanding the law, the facts of your case, what the court would likely order if you did not settle, and the limits of your financial and emotional resources.
Example Scenario
Consider this example: Jane and John have been married for 12 years. They have two children, ages 8 and 10. Jane paused her career to raise the children. John earns $110,000 per year as an engineer. Jane now works part-time, earning $22,000 per year. Together they own a home with $150,000 in equity, have $20,000 in retirement accounts, and no significant debt. Jane wishes to make a settlement offer that avoids litigation but still reflects what she honestly and reasonably believes to be fair and what the court would probably do.
Know the Legal Framework
Before offering any terms, know what the law provides:
Property and Debt Division: Utah applies the principle of “equitable distribution.” This means a presumption of an equal division of marital property, but that does not necessarily mean an automatic 50/50 split. The court is guided by what it considers an “equitable” (fair) division of marital property. The court considers the length of the marriage, each spouse’s contributions, and their future financial circumstances. As a result, an “equitable” division may be unequal in percentage terms — for example, one spouse may receive a larger share of assets if the court finds that spouse will have significantly fewer future earning opportunities or made disproportionate non-financial contributions to the marriage.
Alimony: In Utah, the court may award alimony for up to the length of the marriage but is not required to do so. Utah’s alimony provisions are found in Utah Code Title 81, Chapter 4, Part 5. These statutes address factors such as earning capacity, the marital standard of living, and whether one spouse sacrificed career opportunities for the family.
Child Custody and Parent-Time: Custody determinations are based on the best interest of the child (whatever that means—it’s such a nebulous term that it is often butchered by parents and courts alike in making self-serving arguments). For a more concrete list of factors the courts must consider when analyzing and make the child custody and parent-time awards, review Utah Code Title 81, Chapter 9.
Utah courts are increasingly (though not exclusively) beginning with a presumption of joint physical custody and then determine practical parenting schedules. Minimum parent-time is outlined in § 81-9-302.
Legal custody (which is different from physical custody in that it pertains to the authority to decide matters of a child’s health care, education, and related matters) is presumed to be jointly shared between the parents until that presumption can be overcome.
Child Support: Utah uses the income shares model. Payments are calculated based on both parties’ gross incomes and the custody arrangement, using the Utah Office of Recovery Services calculator. In short, the income shares model blends both parents’ incomes into a single pool, calculates the amount needed for the child according to state guidelines, and then assigns each parent a percentage share of that obligation based on their relative incomes and how much time the children spend in the care and custody of each parent.
What Makes a Settlement Proposal “Reasonable”?
The court does not base its decision on what either party feels is fair; it focuses on what is equitable according to the law governing divorce and child custody and the evidence relevant to them.
In Jane’s situation, a reasonable proposal might look something like this (but certainly would not be the only possible reasonable proposal):
- Property: A 60/40 division in Jane’s favor, reflecting her reduced career opportunities due to raising the children. This is an equitable adjustment rather than a windfall.
- Custody: Equal (50/50) joint physical and legal custody with a week-on/week-off schedule. Jane is not attempting to “win custody,” but to preserve her relationship with the children.
- Alimony: Four years of support at $1,000 per month to help Jane regain financial independence2.
- Child Support: Based on their incomes and the custody arrangement, John would pay approximately $596 per month under Utah’s child support guidelines.
This proposal reflects a highly possible court outcome closely enough that rejecting it could make John appear unreasonable.
How Much Should You Concede?
You do not need to give up more than the law would require simply to appear cooperative. Settlement is not about being generous for its own sake. It is about making a calculated assessment of risk and reward. For example, if Jane’s attorney believes she could likely obtain 65% of the assets and longer alimony at trial, she might still offer 60% and shorter alimony to avoid the stress, cost, and uncertainty of litigation.
Evaluate your best alternative to a negotiated agreement. If trial would cost $20,000 and yield only marginally better results, settlement may be the more rational, more economical choice.
Practical Tips for Making the Offer
- Put it in writing. Send the offer by email or letter and clearly outline all terms. Keep the tone professional and free of emotional irrelevancies.
- Cite your reasoning. Reference applicable facts, statutes, and case law that support your positions.
- Set a deadline. Ten to fourteen days is typical. You are negotiating, not pleading.
- Label it properly. Mark the document “for settlement purposes only (Utah Rules of Evidence 408)” to help prevent its use against you in court if negotiations fail.
What If Your Spouse or Co-Parent Ignores or Rejects Your Offer?
If the other party rejects the offer or does not respond, you still gain valuable information: you now know the terms he/she will not accept, and you have demonstrated to the court that you attempted to resolve the matter reasonably.
From there, you may choose to adjust your proposal or proceed with litigation tools such as temporary orders, mediation, or trial. And do not allow an initial rejection to deter you from negotiating later.
Final Thoughts
Offering settlement is not surrender. It is a sign that you understand the law, the facts, and the likely outcomes in your case, and that you wish to avoid unnecessary conflict and expense. If you do not yet know what to offer, you may not be ready to settle. Learn the law, understand your case, and consult with someone who does (i.e., a skilled lawyer—it’s more than worth your time and effort).
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